In this month’s video blog, I talk about the importance of taking care of yourself.
Archives for January 2016
In this episode, I am joined by Mike Ferry as we talk about teaching our children to be happy. Mike is a smart guy and has done some research in the area of teaching our children to be happy. He has a book out called Teaching Happiness and Innovation.
We need to teach our kids habits that will make them happier and more innovative. Some of the habits include practicing gratitude and extending kindness.
Along with listening to music, practicing the habits of gratitude and kindness are known producers of dopamine (i.e. the happiness transmitter).
Many of us are wired to whine. Practicing dopamine producing habits will rewire us to shine!
Mike also talks about the abundance paradox, which is when we have more than we need, it makes it more difficult for us to appreciate anything in our lives.
So often we chase money and riches thinking that will make us happy. I was reminded of a quote while writing up these notes from Jim Carrey. He said, “I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it’s not the answer.”
Think about that the next time you want to buy a PowerBall ticket!
I messed up bad this week. I really disappointed my kids. Specifically, Emma.
I received a text message from her the other day as I was eating lunch.
Emma: Did you take MY buttered noodles?
Me: Oops. (guilty face emoji)
Emma: Dad! Now I am without noodles…the noodles that I made! The noodles I was so happy to eat today!
Me: I’m sorry. (tearful face emoji)
Look, parents, sometimes we will disappoint our kids. Sometimes it’s just taking their noodles on accident when we didn’t realize it was their noodles that they were planning to eat for lunch. But sometimes it’s something bigger. Maybe a missed ballgame, a missed speech contest or other event of theirs that they were hoping we would come to. Maybe it’s simply time with them, not playing a game they wanted to play with us, not taking them to that movie we promised, not coming through on a commitment we said we would come through on.
Your kids will get over a broken promise every now and then but you can’t make a habit of it. When you do mess up, break a commitment or a promise, talk to them, admit you made a mistake and apologize. Just because you’re the parent doesn’t mean you don’t have to admit your faults to your kids. It doesn’t mean you don’t have to apologize.
Our kids will love and respect us more when we are real with them like that. When we demonstrate and model the actions we want them to take when they mess up, they will learn more quickly from us. We are to model the behavior we expect them to have.
So you may be wondering if my daughter ever forgave me. When I got home I apologized to her and she yet again expressed her disappointment. However, I came prepared. I had to stop for gas on the way home from work so I stepped into the gas station to get a Twix candy bar for her. I pulled it out of my pocket to give to her and asked, “will this help make it better?” “Yep!” she replied with a grin. Whew!
Now, I don’t mean to imply that you can just buy your way out of a mess you may have gotten yourself into. It may work for taking your daughter’s buttered noodles but it won’t replace time missed with you. But it doesn’t hurt to go a little out of your way to try and make up for it.
Fun Times with Dad: I took Emma and Nolan to All Fired Up in West Lafayette to do a craft project. We purchased a ceramic item and they got to paint it. I like to have stuff like this to do during break.
In this episode I talk about passive parenting and the example we find in the Bible. 1 Samuel 2 talks about Eli and the disaster that his sons are. They are wicked and sinful. The Bible calls them corrupt. But Eli doesn’t do much to help the situation. He knows what’s going on but he doesn’t do anything about it.
Kyle Idleman actually talks about this in his book, AHA (chapter 10). He says that all the action Eli took was that he gives them a good talking to.
What Do We Honor More Than God?
Do you honor your children more than God? God poses this question to Eli and challenges him on his job as a parent. We cannot put our children above God. Regardless of how tired we are at the end of the day, we need to take care of the things that we need to take care of.
Our passive approach to the action God has called us to take shows that we are honoring something more than Him. – Kyle Idleman
Reject Passivity in Your Parenting
An intentional parent will reject passivity.